it gets so hard, having to pretend
days go by fine, sometimes months

then it's thrown in my face
once again, always the same

you were supposed to love me
to protect me from the world

why do you think it didn't matter
why do you think it didn't hurt me

that it would be okay to see him again
just cause we are grown, nothing has changed

i know...he knows
i cant play games, pretend things are fine

i switch my life around, make strange choices
for me, its easier this way

id rather been seen as capricious,
or odd...than eternally flawed

because that's what i am
that's what happened that day, so long ago

i wish i could show you how much it hurt
no, not what he did...but your reaction to it, to me